maing's learning path

to gal

2009-06-27T08:53:00.000-07:00

u make me heart ache everyting u did...i was wondering did u consider my feeling when u post up ur blog?..did u consider my feeling of wat outsiders will tink bout me??if u really hate me,jus tell me,i leave i leave home n no one wil complain u,no one stop u frm everyting,i will leave home if u tink i spoil all ur good days..i would jus go without second word..actly all ting is jus fine, y u wan make it seem miserable..y wan tink tis n tat...did ah jiet do anyting wrong to u?don knw y u day by day make urself seem terible to us..u say frm now on u no blogging...
ME FROM NOW ON WONT TOUCH A TING OF OURS..I WONT COMPLAIN U..UR LIFE IS URS,ME TIS LOUSY SIS WONT BE ABLE TO LEAD U GOOD EXAMPLE..SORRY FOR ALL THE TING I DONE..IM A STUPID N JUST A RUBBISH SIS U CAN IGNORE FOR UR WHOLE LIFE..U NO NID DRAG IN MY BF...THE PROB IS WIF ME N U ...ONLY ME N U!

attn to dav yeo..

2009-06-20T22:20:00.000-07:00

im sorry,i am really sorry...i promise frm now on i wont tel o write anyting i felt anymo..im sorry ,wud u forgive me...in here, i teling everyone who read this....im asking an apologise frm dav yeo on wat i did...

n to everyone tat join the few gathering....im sorry for din atending all of it...but indeed i was bz working in las few week..SORRY

left out...

2009-06-11T08:20:00.000-07:00

sad...y i keep feeling im so left out frm my frens? ya thy r bck but i no longer been a proper invitation from them...even if i join i felt bad bout myself..i live in a dif world frm thm..thy study i work..dif stuf cant b compare...

to the organiser of the gathering...im sorry if i ever did anyting wrong to u..but could u tell me y u avoid me so muc...can tell me whr my mistake is...we use to b good fren but y now u treat me tis way?im reallly really hurt..

im trying my best to cover watever i can ord...pls don say i change..i didn.but u ppl force me to...i never put away my fren,frens r frens,my bf is bf..thy both gav me dif feell.i really don wan to b treated like i change afta i got bf...honestly...if u ppl keep treating me tis way i hav no choice beside changing myself like u ppl tinking

sad sad...

2009-05-25T10:38:00.000-07:00

i cried alot since last two nite...my heart pain like being slices...wats the prob wif me?wats the prob wif my bf? y u all don like him?? jus bcoz he is not well educated?o juz bcoz he spend mo time with me?wats the hell going on?my younger did sumting tat really make me disapointed,i only wana ground her for her good...tats wat u do to me las time...did u ppl tink of wat i felt las time?im was like her las time but did u give me chance to explain?till now u ppl stil don giv me chance to eplain...u tot i din know how bad she tell ppl how badly i treat her now?i knew it but im not the who dont wana talk to her...u ask her wat has her reaction when i firstly told her bout how i knew ah jiet?she not only show no interest but doin harsh on me?she told me she hate hearing me saying his name...if i say i hate u saying the ppl u like wat would u feel?n i wud say the same ting each time u mention his name...TELL ME WAT WOULD U DO?

u ppl tink i shud bear the responsibility for taking of family,rite? how old am i?how mature am i? how perfect am i?u ppl aspect me to bear this family without mistake?y don we exchange...i leave home n u cum bck n care...i really cnt do all wat u wan me to do...im sorry...do u ppl knw how bad i feel whn family got crisis?do u knw how bad it feel whn u nid to act strong infront of everybody?the only time i could feel weak is when im wif my bf...but behind me u ppl stil say bad bout him n me..wats my wrong?whres my mistake?

u ppl tot i hav no stress ma?i only didn show it.i don wana everyone felt pity of me...i wana u guys my family safe n happy...if i dn k u ppl i wudn wan to stay at home...if i don k i cud jus leave home...my salary is jus enuf for me to survive outside ..i can no nid uc u ppl n saty on my own...but did i do tat?NO....U R MY FAMILY...I ONLY WANA SEE U PPL HAPPY...TATS ALL

n one mo ting....since i pakto i seldom hav the world of two...my bf allow me bring my family out during my offday...even to movie we bring gal along...do u blif we been together half year but our days of being world of two is countable by my fingers?u ppl r not around..u ppl din knw wat happen here..pls stop acusing me...do u know how muc i hope u ppl would read this?but i knw its imposible coz im not ah gal...im not the youngest..u ppl don tink im stress...im always tinking the wrong way...im sorry im really sorry..im stupid n really not qualified being our sis..a sales gal will make u ashamed only...im sorry...i cnt lead our younger sis a good way..im not a good example at all..sorry

to gal...
im sorry wat i done to u but i really don know wat i shud do n wat i shudn do...u said i change?yup i did...im no longer keep crying gal..know y?coz i don wana u ppl feel bad n sad for me..i nid to b strong then those weaker wud only learn n stand up..i no longer speak out loud gal...u know y?bcos we nid to b responsible of every word tat we spoke...i no longer speak muc..know y?coz u make me feel i always speak wrong ting...u make me feel my every words hurts u...im sorry for not being a gud sister

frens reunited

2009-05-20T09:08:00.000-07:00

haha...finally i wait for months...my frens all bck i went dinner n yamcha with the other day...although its only five of us im happy enuf...but in certain moment i felt bad n left out as im no longer a student like thm...thy share their studies experience, haha...u were tinking i cud share mine too? lol...come on la who knws wats im facing n wat im doing in shop all time? outsides r only my mum n my bf knws lo...ok bck to main point...tat nite we dine in together at third mile thn we proceed to isabella...we play poker card...we chit chat thr...n lastly we hav photo taking..haha...let u c some

hey i update u again when i get my 21st bday pic ya...muacks...take k oh

decision made o not?

2009-04-12T07:57:00.000-07:00

las week i rcv call frm the swatch group comp...thy call up ask me for inteview...thy told me thy wil sponsor me if i pass in interview but i will b bond by the company 4 years...4 years working +2 years course...6 years...6 YEARS!!! i nid to b in kl 6 years..r u joking me?? my family is here,my bf is here...ya, i know wat were u tinking...i can come bck afta tat rite? no u wrong i only hav my gud future in tis industry in west m'sia...which mean once i step out frm kch i wnt b bck for a long time...heart ache lo....afta few day consideration,i gav up...i stay..i really don hav courage to face the world outside kch...im scared...y am i so weak??too cover up myself..i used my family n bf to b my excuse to stay...im selfish..im stupid..im weak..so sorry mum n dad..i realy don dare..can u ppl let me stay bside u..can u let me continue my work...i knw my salary not muc..i knw i cnt b like sis got lecturer o engineer title on thm..im only a sales girl but im really comfort in tis job...it really bring me no stress..it bring a happy live..i don nid bring my stress hoe at all...i really love tis job...i knw i hav no choice except further my studies like sis..i owes wondering y u ppl wan me b same as sis,thy are capable,im not...i owes try to obey u all..i really hope i cud hav my own decision now..i knw u ppl wan tat is 4 my own good but do u ever tink wat i was tinking,wat i felt n wat i wan? i only wan a simple life..i do not nid high salary to aford my life..i only wan to hav happy days in all my life..

let me share sumting wif u...

Here is the differences between a businessman and
fisherman..............
So....u can decide...to be a businessman or to be a fisherman........,
What do you really hope to achieve in life?
Read this story and you may find that what you are always hoping to achieve, you may be already have it.

There was once an American businessman who was sitting by the beach in a small Mexican village. As he sat, he saw a Mexican fisherman rowing a small boat towards the shore and noticed that the fisherman has caught a quite number of big fishes that is known to be a delicacy.

The American was really impressed and ask the fisherman, "How long does it take you to catch so many fishes?"

The fisherman reply; "Oh, just a short while."

"Then why don't you stay longer at sea and you could catch even more? The businessman was astonished.

The fisherman simply does not agree, "This is enough to feed my whole family?" he says.
The businessman then asked: "So, what do you do for the rest of the day then?

"The fisherman reply; "Well, I usually wake up early in the morning, go out to sea and catch a few fishes, then I would go back and play with my kids.In the afternoon, I will take a nap with my wife, and evening comes, I will join my buddies in the village for a drink, we played guitar, sing and dance throughout the night. My day was ever so complete and carefree."

The businessman does not agree with his way of life and offered a suggestion to the fisherman. "I am a PhD holder graduated from Harvard University, specialises in business management. I could help you to become a more successful person. From now on, you have to spend more time at sea and try to catch as many fishes as possible. And when you have save enough money, you could buy a bigger boat and catch even more fishes. As you go on, you will be able to afford to buy more boats, recruit more fishermen and lead a team of your own. Soon you will be able to set-up your own company, your very own production plant for canned food and do direct selling to your distributors.At that time, you will have moved out of this village and to Mexico city, and then expand your operation to LA, and finally to New York city, where you can set-up your HQ to manage all your other branches."

The fisherman asks, "So, how long would that take?

" The businessman reply: "About 15 to 20 years"

The fisherman continued, "And after that?"

The businessman laugh heartily, "After that, you can live like a king in your own house, and when the time is right, you can go public and float your shares in the Stock Exchange, by then you will be rich, your income will be coming in by the millions!!"

The fisherman ask, "And after that?"

The businessman says "After that, you can finally retire, you can move to a house by the fishing village, wake up early in the morning and catch a few fishes, then return home to play with the kids, have a nice afternoon nap with your wife, and when evening comes, you can join your buddies for a drink, play the guitar, sing and dance throughout the night!! "

The fisherman was puzzled, "Isn't that what I am doing now??"

So, what does one really hope to achieve in life, do we really need to work so hard in life ? What do you hope to accomplish in the end ?

afta reading n u know wat? i only wan to b like the fisherman..

update a bit when he is out station...hahaha...

2009-03-30T10:28:00.000-07:00

today is ntg special but i jus wana update my blog...

since i pakto,i hardly could online...my dear don really allow me to online muc..he scare i would meet sumone beta...of coz he din knw he is my last bf i would wan to hav...its ok 4 me if he don allow me online..as long as he acc me mo...thrs ntg else i wud request...

lately im up to to apply in watch making matriculation...i don knw wether i got chance o not but im trying my luck n im decided...i only cont my study if i manage get into wacth-making matri...i hope i could hold last for this decision..its time for me to grow up make my own decision...dad mum sis...my future is mine...i decide my own path...i knw u ppl r trying to b gud but pls be aware tat i hav no interest in local uni subj...

k la i update some pic let u c wat i do most of time

during cny

during tua pek kong parade...i join in the walk but im wearing my own clothes

haha..i nearly forgot sumting..talk so long i forgot recomend my bf to u...he is kenny wong

our first time..1st pic taken together...1st valentine together

k la...i update nex time ya..miss u all....

halo..finnaly bck...

2009-03-13T07:55:00.000-07:00

hmmm.its been ages i din blog ord ...haiz...pakto lo make me no time..sometime still got lil regret geting into tis relationship...yup its been 3 mth im wif himm seem short but we seem knw each other very long...i hardly hav time online bcoz he don really like me online lo..today is bcoz he go play basketball..dump me aside i baru got time blogging...but actly very unhappy lo..we surpose to meet tonite but he din...he rather to play his basketball...sien liao....diet really important thn me meh...ahhh.....sien ah....

tpday is a bored day...

2009-01-12T07:37:00.000-08:00

today i work mornin shift..the unlucky me got diahorea..in n out toilet a couple of time lo...humph...when i wan go home my dear wasn at his counter so i left without seeing him..he..haiz..say me bosim lo...im still rmb get him a starbuck b4 i go home n rest..so sad to hear tat..but afta hering my explaination..he apologize 4 saying me..thn he surposely acc me go shoping but don knw y ended up put me aeroplane...bopian get my family backup..haiz...hope tml he cud acc me lo...i miss him so muc...btw jus nw i bought 2pcs of cny clothes lo..one sexy one cute cute de..haha..haiz now 12am liao y he still not home yet..making me follow cnt slep nia...faster call me liao..am sleppy ord..

1-1-2009 happy new year...

2009-01-01T10:01:00.000-08:00

wow...so fast tat a year has past..everyting seem to b past ord..hmm..but my tis year christmas n new year is sumting dif..i hav my dear acc me gone through...we told my family bout it..my mum so far ok wif it..humph..glad tat evryting is fine...new year eve dear,me,mum,dad,janet,robert went steamboat together..its was a great one....afta steamboat dad n mum go happy hour while me n my dear go bbq wif my colleague till 1am..although we plan to hav own world but din success,we both happy wif ourselves..thanx dear dear..i love u so muc..im really lucky to hav u...

i fell so sad..

2008-12-15T10:53:00.000-08:00

y even my younger sis don understand me..i was deeply hurt...i work so hard ..i face dif customer..i experience the hardship wif coullegue bcoz of wat...i only wana giv my family member a comfortable life...i wan thm life hapily,no worries,n healty..tats all i don mind scarifise my laptop...i don mind eating maggi cup o bread..i don mind spending muc wif hamily..i dn mind working partime to earn mo...but y my sis don understand me..y she wana angry me bcoz of my bf...do i reaaly look tat weak til i cnt protect myself?am i wrong to feel some swet word frm outsiders? im so damn stupid...so damn stupid..i hate myself..i hate myself for cnt help family n owes make family worry..I HATE MYSELF..I HATE U CHEWMA ING......

blog seem to b only place i cud tel my feeling

2008-12-08T20:20:00.000-08:00

lately family facing financial prob..n again i nid face it without crying o showing tat im weak..i tot i cud buy my laptop las weekend but bcoz of family i gave my laptop,my sony camera n my studies oso...finaly i cud make my final decission..afta 4 year degree,the money i earn afta tat still b rm2k..y don i continue my job thn i can do saving n standby anytime to face tings like tis time...i do not blame my dad at all...i choose tis way myself...it indeed a very tough way for me but i blif i can do it as long as i hold on myself steady...god wnt treat me so bad rite?

oso lately i meet a guy,he seem to b so good...of coz he hav weakness too..yup he is not well educated...he is not rich..but not too bad looking but mos important he care for me...now we 2 geting close..he admited tat he like me..yup..me too..but im still considering..my life now stil unstable...i don wan my relationship not lasting again..

eversince my family facing prob n i met tis new guy..i realise i lost place for me to complain...my young sis no longer talk to me bcoz she don like tat chasing afta me..she weird rite..but tis time i don wan let anyone afect my choice...my fren?yup i still contact wif thm but honest i really tink working ppl n studying ppl dn hav common topic..im seem mising in their topic...i tried ignore al tat..i tried i dn wana lost any fren anymo..my couleege?none of thm i cud tell my feling de...im all by myself now..u sure tink of the guy chasing me..yup we two r gud but i still don knw him wel..i don how safety i m to b bside him..tings seem to b like fairy tale..he apear in my life treating me likemy dream man...i owes wanted a person treat me tat way..i cant resist tat gud n sweet feling..god r u playing trick on me?is he real?is his heart true?

hmmm.....family n frens gathering...

2008-11-25T07:12:00.000-08:00

halo my dear......

hmm..my frens finally bck n i finally hav my holiday frm work,1 day off + 3 day leave....hehe...yesterday was my 1st day of leave...early mornin when to skul meet up wif fren n get my stpm cert...thn we when for brunch (breakfast + lunch) chit chating till 12 noon lo...half year separated really cudnt update all at once..afta tat when bck to my working place window shopin...syndy,kai liang n me got colour contact lense for ourself...n kai liang got himself a new spec oso..we all help him choose de..hehe..

kai liang wif his new spec..tats syndy nex to him.

tats wat i do while waiting 4 kai liang

tats sister irene nex to me..she is my nex door collegue..
we in sam company

today,mornin i was waken by my daugther..u knw la..my off day is their most happy day in a week coz i sure bring thm go play..i wud bring thm shopin o go frenship park o go swiming o anyting tat cud bring hapines to thm...today i brought thm to boulevard...c thm jump up n dwn really giv me undescribedalbe felling..its a joy in me seeing kids swet smile...no worry i will put sum up n share wif u....boulevard tis mth ord got christmas as their theme..let me share wif u..ya.....

tis is the idea of boulevard christmas decoration....

the pic below is the album of the day in boulevard..hahaha...

at nite i gather wif my fren..brought my sis along as i scare to drive alone in rainy nite...hehe...me,my sis, kai liang,syndy n her bf,zi ning n her bf..only tis few of us..zin ning n her bf cum late left early so no pic of hers....we chit chating n do our fav ting..gossiping...haha...tats us..sharing ma...but honest to say wif sum of the topic im spechles..uni courses..hmm..mayb wait nex year i join bck tat society life thn i cud get into their talks...

tats bing in padungan

final group photo...we r the best of all...rite guys?

today 16/11/2008

2008-11-16T02:16:00.000-08:00

hmm...today jus change my frenster profile layout,the theme..."ur silent hurts me so muc"
tis theme remind me deeply how i felt frm the very begining...cmk..i knw u wnt read tis but i wana tell u how i really felt...i nvr cheat on u..my feeling was true for u...ur silent really is a prob to me...honest to say i nvr give up on u..i will pray the best of evryting for u..i love u....take k...u let me go is equal to i let u go...

hmmm...wat else ho...now really waitng for my besfren all cum bck..i mis thm..wen ping bck...now wait aina,kai liang n syndy to b bck...i wan to mount climbing...i wan bbq..i wan go sing k...hmmm...so muc ting to do..don knw my 4 days leave enuf to use bo..hahaha...

haiz..mum bday cumin soon,wat shud i get for her?ang pao?bday cake?o gift suc as softtoys?
hahaha..jk jk...i dn knw la..suden run out of idea....

take notice my vincent

2008-11-06T09:47:00.000-08:00

haha...don keep rush me update ma...me got idea oso will giv u rush till don knw wan write wat lo....y donb u giv me ur site...i go visit...

my history

2008-11-02T09:25:00.000-08:00

hmm..today im her to tel u my love life...the very 1st time i feel dif of a guy is i was in f1..tat guy was my bus mate ...but ended up he like my godsister..haha..thn when im in f2 i hav a bf ...he is a very nice,swet n capable guy but afta a mth 2gether we broke up..i fell so uncomtable n pity of him...im agud gal at home..so i don dare cheat my mum n go out wif him at all...n for sure tats puppy love...afta tat i fall in love again wif my busmate..he is a big fat guy...bad in studies..but he is a very caring guy..he protect me all the tim altought i owes argue tis n tat wif him..since f4 i never ever forget him..he knew i like him but thrs ntg he can do as he hav a gf ord..al i cud is only mis him n guessing his day everyday..yaya..i knw im stupid falling for suc a guy but thr ntg i cud help frm faling...hmm..actly in btwn still alot of story but it migth b mo private ..heheh..so i will jus stop here..hahaha..take k ya..

my f6 life....

2008-10-26T08:29:00.000-07:00

once mention my f6 life i learn so muc thr...i get to knw how was the best skul was like,then i get to study wif boys (u sure tink im weird,no im frm gurls skul,tats y i say in tat way)
in thr my best clasmate was kai liang,syndy,joash,wen ping......lots mo..but tis few is d greatest...syndy is a fashion n swet gals..she owes update wif fashion stuf but yet oso cud do wel in her exam..while kai liang is d guy who sat bside me..he indeed a bookworm..he is smart but owes forget tis n tat in his working especially maths..haha..joash..hmm..he is my class monitor,a funy one,n he is a genius..oso the only one get band 6 in muet in my skul..isnt him cool..since his eng gud so his mandarin is badly spoken..so kai liang wud teach him mandarin,thn joash wud teach him eng...haha..so in btwn i got benifit frm both parties..learn both at once...but sumtime when our class hav freetime..all mos of our classmate wud gather round n chit chating..haha..in btwn u can hear yaun tat,thomas n siong lung mention cold jokes....thn if wnt knw fashion,ask lynda o jen ai,tis two gal cud turn u frm ugly duckling into a big beauty..whn everyone happy sharing jokes...u cud suden hear ppl asking ques of how to do tis maths ques..yes,no one else except jason wud do tat....hmmm whn afta exam we sure arange sum program to enjoy even just yamcha...me,kai liang, syndy,siong lung wud apear together..sumtime wud add on wif jason,joash,jen ai,lynda n priscilla..

the pic below is one of the gathering we went to...
venue:living room
date:30th june 2007

hmm..do we look like one big family?pls don recognise me,im ugly in tis pic

tis few couple r all my classmate in f6....

let u enjoy sum pic la..hmm..d pic below is taken during celebrating national day in skul.we all was force to wear natinal cloth like baju kebaya,baju kurung,cheongsam,o batik..haha

one whole class..

my PA teacher n me..she young rite?..hahaha

me n robin..he not my classmate..jus my bes buddy frm nex door..he is the one recomend me work in city chain

tis r my class walking fashion..hahaha

kai liang like b ppl lamp post de lo...hahaha

f6 indeed brougth me a lots of memory...im really happy in f6...thanks guys..i love u ppl the best..take k ya...

the begining of my life

2008-10-22T08:00:00.000-07:00

my life started when i was born on 17 may 1988..when i was kids my parents pamper me alot,i nvr felt abandoned at all until my lil sis come to the world..i don rmb muc bout my childhood tings..one of the ting i rmb is my grandma pass away when i was in primary 2..n when im in primary skul..i don hav muc fren..i don hav any chinese fren coz im a poor student..the rest of the chinese r rich..so i mixaround wif bumiputra ..frm thm i learn bahasa sarawak n oso bahasa iban..i even can comunicate fluently in it...i only hav chinese fren when im in pri 5..her name..shu wen..she came frm semenanjung.. ever since she is my best fren til now but during f3 she went bck kl..left me alone here face my f4 n f5 alone..without her bside me help me in my studies..i badly done my exam n al ting r not rite..i lose my fren one by one..in f4 n f5 everyday i only go skul slep in class n do my own ting as i hardly catch teacher lecture...my life indeed empty without her...(im not les lo)

tis is my best fren shu wen

afta f5 i knw another bestfren named aina...she the one brougth my life bck to normal..she bring me along when im really lost contact wif my fren whom abandoned me..haha..im sure u felt i too "yi lai" my fren,rite?u cant blame me..in my family im im the 3rd daugther..i hardly get attention frm family..i hav 2 elder sis whom did really gud in academic...thn u knw la youngest no nid do anyting cud get atention..so ngam aina family oso 4 sisters n yet she in position 3..altougth she less share her ting but she indeed a gud listeners..she able bring my moody mood away..coz i nvr seen her in bad mood b4..she nvr cry..she teach me to b strong..teach me to smile al the time..she teach me to b optimistic..i really duno wat else can i ask frm her..yup in btwn i got get mad of her whn she 1stly start relationship wif her bf..i even said thy wnt last long..im really sorry..i din mean to hurt u..i was out of my mind..sorry aina..n thanks 4 owes b thr 4 me..

aina in yellow shirt

*hmm...i tink i continue my f6 life story in nex post

21-10-08,my day...

2008-10-21T12:39:00.000-07:00

today migth b a day which is not unique for others but it do...today its d 3rd mth i join bck city chain...afta cut off al the one mth holiday i had join city chain for 7mth..time really pases really fast...i wonder how i pass my days all tis while...i been trougth the warm welcome frm my coullegue,the strugling of achieve our sales...afta went bck i been through the reall reality of working life..i heard the worst critisizing of me..faces good n oso complain full customer..i learn a lot in city chain...a working experience whr i finally knw wats a working life is...
today my oficer n company oficer came,i only been complain one ting...tats is my makeup,my officer say is too light..gosh im been using tat way of makeup all tis while..wan me change is really a dificult one 4 me too learn..memories all the watches is not a prob but makeup is a big prob 4 e...gosh...wat shud i do oh????

halo..everyone

2008-10-18T12:26:00.000-07:00

halo,guys nice too meet u all n thx 4 wiling to spend time reading it..my first time bloging in blogger page...frm now on i will try write down all my history n present tings tat happen to share wif u all...hope u ppl wnt b bored wif it..haha...